??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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