She is in my trunk
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
