May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Your cock deserves a montage
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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