That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Randomize
