..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
