Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
