I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
