Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
