I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
