Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize