It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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