The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
