we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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