To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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