do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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