Kiss
Puke
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
