Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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