just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize