You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
