can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
