He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize