i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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