I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
