Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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