On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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