"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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