...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
