just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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