Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
