People with herpes should wear stickers.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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