i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
