Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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