sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
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