So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
