he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
