How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
