he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
