we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
