I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
