So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize