I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
