I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize