What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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