Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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