i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
only you would photoshop your dick
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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