Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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