at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
this will be a night to untag.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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