i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize