Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Randomize