Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
