the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
